Google Adsense

Well, since you've read all my posts at this point, I know you know I need money. What a better way to earn money than to add Google Adsense into your weblog? It really earns you a little money on the side. Also if you are a referral for Adsense, you a little more money. The only catch is that yes, you, the viewer has to click on the pages. Also at the bottom of my pages, I've added the Firefox logo which is a browser like netscape and it is supposed to be faster. Did you know that if you download Firefox, I earn a dollar? Try it and let me know what you think. I would really appreciate it. Happy Browsing.

Meatballs and Pink Lemonade

Well, this afternoon I've realized I've come full circle. After happily hearing that I found a new job, I got up and cleaned my sink-full of dishes. I was depressed since I was supposed to have begun my new job with a brand new company two months ago. They've changed the starting date several times and once again, today, I was informed they've changed it one more time to a later date. Anyway, I am happy about my new job offer and will be happily employed soon. (Cheer)

For lunch, I made "meatballs", rather flat meatballs, called "hamburger patties" and lemonade. I'm not really lying as my title implied but the reason I find this so amazing is because when I was little, my mother would often make us lemonade and my father's favorite meal was meatballs with lemonade.The whole family enjoyed this meal a lot. Even more amazing is that I actually recall this memory from the few I recollect of my mother, father, sisters, and brother together. My mother died when I was four and I really do not remember much of anything else.

I found it odd that today, I realized that I'm in a way coming around full circle. I just now need a few children around a dining room table with a husband demanding to be served. I do not think I'll be carrying that tradition on after all we all have hands and feet (Unlike meatballs).

A Real Prison

Recently, I interviewed at the Jester Unit in Richmond, Texas, a prison for psychiatric criminals. In reading some of the prisoner's biography's, I was reminded that many build their prisons simply by one act. Most of the prisoners at Jester Unit are schizophrenic or have been diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, as well as anti-social personalities. By looking at their faces, one can see the mask that is commonly worn on their faces, a stoned-faced look. A look commonly worn by Schizophrenic patients. A unit within the prison system is supposed to be the most restrictive incarceration a prisoner can experience, a prototype of the Alcatraz prison in California.

What cue triggers their one act, the reason leading to a life-time sentence? In looking at their disorder from a current psychological perspective, a more objective reason is found. In theory, many factors would have led a prisoner to committ a crime such as family background, biological predispostion to a disorder or illness, a trauma, or a distinct psychotic episode. An objective view of an individual's act, reason, or perspective is a view that places no stigma or blame on a individual but should on their act.

Looking at their disorders from an old perspective, a person deviating from the norm, was considered insane or "mad". What madness drives a person to kill, to mame, to hurt without consideration for someone other than himself or herself? Madness or abormal behavior, thoughts, and actions, are a representation or indication of a person's emotions and thoughts, indicating an "illness" or trauma within the person. It is their outcry to the world of this "wrongness". In the past, it was thought that a person was demon-possessed. Obviously, in the present, the belief in demon-posession has nearly been removed.

A prison represents to me a safe confined space, a removal from reality, and a tortoruous isolation from people. People really are social-beings and need others to model behavior and to model for others. A prison also represents to me a "modern cage of steel", a representation of a prisoner's cognitive construct modeled in "real life". To explain what a psychotic episode experience might be for a prisoner imagine the moment when you loose your calm, "your cool". If you've ever lost your calm, then you probably know what triggering a psychotic episode is like. It is a quick disconnection from your comfortable self (ego), from your conscienceness. In thinking about a person's reasons for seeking to dissasociate from reality, one has to ask what the factor or factors were leding them there.

If you do not think there are forces beyond a person's control, you at least have to question their existence.

MY OWN PRISON
A court is in session, a verdict is in
No appeal on the docket today
Just my own sin
The walls are cold and pale
The cage made of steel
Screams fill the room
Alone I drop and kneel
Silence now the sound
My breath the only motion around
Demons cluttering around
My face showing no emotion
Shackled by my sentence
Expecting no return
Here there is no penance
My skin begins to burn
So I held my head up high
Hiding hate that burns inside
Which only fuels their selfish pride
We're all held captive
Out from the sun
A sun that shines on only some
We the meek are all in one
I hear a thunder in the distance
See a vision of a cross
I feel the pain that was given
On that sad day of loss
A lion roars in the darkness
Only he holds the key
A light to free me from my burden
And grant me life eternally
Should have been dead
On a Sunday morning
Banging my head
No time for mourning
Ain't got no time
So I held my head up high
Hiding hate that burns inside
Which only fuels their selfish pride
We're all held captive
Out from the sun
A sun that shines on only some
We the meek are all in one
I cry out to God
Seeking only his decision
Gabriel stands and confirms
I've created my own prison
Creed

PINK

Aerosmith is going to be in Houston on Monday, January 23, 2006 and the concert is sold-out, not surprisingly. The song PINK first came out in 1997 under "Nine Lives".

The color PINK is a softer, less violent red. Pink is the sweet side of red. Pink is more commonly used by girls or baby girls and is indicative of softness and girls.
It represents sugar and spice and everything nice.

Click here to launch music video

1. PINK

video code provided by singingfool.com

PINK PHRASES
"In The Pink 'This comes from the English foxhunting tradition - 'the unspeakable in pursuit of the uneatable' - Wilde. People who foxhunt often wear scarlet jackets; in the unfettered approach of the English to their own language these are called pinks. If you are in the pink you would be about to set off to gallop your horse across country'". [The phrase finder, www.phrases.org.uk/meanings]

Tickled Pink: Healthy, content.

Pink Collar: Female Office Worker.

PINK WORDS: salmon, coral, hot pink, fuschia, blush, flesh, flush, fuchsia, rose.

First Woman President

"Socialist candidate Michelle Bachelet and her daughters, Sofia, left, and Francisca, right, celebrate after the run-off presidential elections in Santiago, Chile, on Sunday" (January 15, 2006).

Mrs. Bachelet is a 54-year old doctor that was a prisoner from 1973-1990 during Augusto Pinochet dictatorship. She was arrested and forced into exile in Australia and East Germany. She stated that she actually ran into one of her torturers in an elevator near her apartment block.

She is reported to be an atheist, a mother of three. Her boyfriend and father (of a heart a attack) died while being a prisoner under Pinochet's dictatorship.

She is reported to focus on women's rights and has advocated the right for women to take the pill "the morning after", and to have made domestic abuse punishable by more than 10 years in prison (among other issues).

Having read all these good news, it makes one wonder when a woman president will be voted for in the United States. Maybe there is still hope for HIllary Clinton to make president in the next election.

Baths and Bubbles, Oh My

I've discovered the beauty and comfort of taking long baths. I even went and bought me a cheap bath bubble soap. I love just laying there for an hour or two. (It's a long time). I even fell asleep in there the other day. The best part of taking baths versus showers is that you smell like lavender the entire night or day.

"I", Mean

I've been thinking about the concept of "I". I seriously first considered it back in H.S. and have since thought about Ayn Rand's work on capitalism and the concept of individualism. "I" is really a powerful word indicating personal self-empowerment to rise above other's views, to individualize yourself, indicate your person and in a sense your self-being in this world. It is difficult to become a core, a space in time with thought. Becoming self-actualized is a discrimination tactic and can mean that others with different beliefs, values, culture, and race may not understand or like who "you" are. Ultimately in becoming "I", a thinking individual, versus one that feels thoughts and emotions out, is the first step to self-actualization. Self-actualization requires time, thought, and effort, which is difficult.

"Ay" [pronounced "I" in Spanish] is a common phrase used by Mexican American indicating when you have hurt someone's feelings by saying, thinking, or doing something they did not like. The phrase "Ay" is also indicative of a wailing or "grito" [to yell] possibly against a common cultural sense which is often common in people.


Happiness is that state of consciousness which proceeds from the achievement of one's values.
-- Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged

Rock Artists

Well, last night I went to go see Mike play drums with a band he just recently formed (today) at a little downtown club in Houston. They were merely the opening acts and the main band, Stabbing Aire, had a lead singer that looked like Mars from Motley Crue. I keep taking second-looks because I was sure this was Mars and he may actually be walking around my presence. It would be like being unaware that your favorite movie star or musician was around and you never even knew. For example, Rosie, a friend I use to speak with more frequently than I do now actually got to see Julia Roberts at the College Station Mall (what?) and then Mike got to say hello to Matt Damon at a Houston airport. Both stars are equally interesting and I happen to like them. However, I kept thinking, would it not be cool to be able to just jam to the beat of drums or actually make a decent tune on a guitar? I mean I was in band for about 9 years but I played the clarinet and bass clarinet. I no longer really read music that frequently buth have continued to enjoy music. My only commentator (Butterscotch Candy)-who happens to be a friend from high school- actually married a guy that plays guitar, drums and knows Spanish. I do not know if you have bothered to read my blog but I've been here at least 2 weeks. I mean, you would know what I am discussing at this moment. Mike is a guy I sort of like except I have a lot more deragotory comments to make about our relationship which I'll keep from discussing any further. I mean I'm hung up on a lot of stuff.hmm Anyway, I find musicians really fun. I cannot say that Motley Crue is my favorite band but I do like them a lot. Tommy Lee from Motley Crue recently had a T.V. show called "Tommy Lee Goes Back to College" in which he went to college for one semester and did not do too badly (had a couple of C's and B's). I thought this guy is actually kind of funny-his immaturity still showed through though and I'm only 31. Anyway, he was also in Houston recently and I did not get to meet him because I tend to work a lot and feel that I really do not want to be a star obsessesed musican lover. Anyway, some stars really are interesting and I might want to meet them. It would be like waiting until a great Star dies to see them through the eyes of the people that loved them as in the recent Princess Diana exhibit here in Houston. I actually payed to go and I often think about money because I'm thrifty and poor. Anyway, meeting someone in person is much more real than just thinking you know them because they are famous and well-known.

Music Video:
href="http://216.180.244.187/videos/k/kelly_clarkson/since_u_been_gone.html" target="_blank">Since U Been Gone by (Kelly Clarkson)

Music Video Code by Video Code Zone

In His Recent Image. About Dubbing.

I have to discuss my recent obsession with the machinations of England and the eventual possession of the crown by Prince William (as evidenced by my membership at the royal forum-a website focusing on royal families). I realize he is young and has a girlfriend but I think he is also an interesting person. It's really not such a serious obsession just infantile considering most people do not have time to be obsessed. I believe I should really work on finding a relationship as I am single. However, we all need a little time to let our minds wonder from our insulated lives to, seriously, outside issues surrounding the world we live in. Yet, I should confess mostly I'm just nosy about whether Prince William is actually going to marry Kate. If her name had been Debbie, would he still marry her? Although the royal family is not really a trendy topic, they are a stable phenomenon of the English family system and its development throughout the centuries. The fact that Prince William is set to rule a country if not directly with all the power of a ruler but as a "spokepersons" of sorts is amazing. When I think about how many years a century really is, I really think it must be such a cross to carry a family tradition that I do not think most people understand. Why doesn't he just abdicate by marrying a jewish girl? You know he can't marry a catholic. However, I understand tradition is important and frankly, I want someone who speaks Spanish fluently and plays guitar. If I happen to run across him in a crowded street and feel that it is love at first sight, I would consider it. Moving on to chemistry, I mean biology is such a hard concept to grasp. If he already has chemistry with Kate and she is from a well to do family-important because she is knowledgeable about English upper class traditions and the power seemingly simple actions carry, then I would probably not go looking anywhere else. I mean, it is better than meeting someone on the street. Speaking of important family ties, does it matter that your twin or soul mate may actually be living somewhere else? What if your perfect chemistry is actually in another country, would you at least like to see what happens? I really should focus on my own relationship building and move my slow, red tired feet along. I had to stop, wonder, and ask because Debbie would like to know.

Madonna Video

Well, to perfect my website, I went snooping around Madonna's website and found a picture I like of her. Madonna is one of my favorite artists. She has captured, in my mind, the essence of the the times she lives in and I feel really conveys her thoughts through her work. Watch the video, "Hung Up", it is a concert in London which she states in the video was actually her first live performance 22 years ago.

Posterchildren

Well, I'm not a poster child for anything. I have often felt like a failure when I do not achieve what I wanted to. You always have to question whether you could have done it with more obstacles but over all- I no longer feel like a sad posterchild-asking for a little sympathy for the lack of parenting skills exhibited by my parents.

I'm adding a picture I thought was awesome, in which a little girl looks so much like me growing up. This poster girl is holding a rabbit and playing with it and I thought it was really cute because she looks so much like me when I was little. I had to take a picture of myself with it in order to remember.

I first saw a poster with a little girl back in junior high that said "You are somebody special because God made you". I thought that was so sweet and neat and it's true. I mean children are really neat little creatures and should not have to go through the confusion of your parent's mistakes, sins, and misunderstandings.

Bloggings

My name is not Faeries or Cosette. However, I like both names for a website title. This is my first blogging "assignment" as it was recommended that I blog. I hope you enjoy it. My actual name is Liz. I feel a little like a copycat since I'm really just blogging because a friend already is. She is blogging and has an English degree. I, on the other hand, have a master's degree in psychology. I hope that does not exclude me from blogging though. I feel like bloggers are interesting, crafty, and a little off the centre. I hope my blogg is as interesting as others and that you enjoy. (Have a cup of coffee, orange juice, wine, or diet coke-you'll enjoy it even more).